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Who knew that the most anticipated Lustrous Globes show ever would be dominated by… dick jokes?

Everyone hoped that host Ricky Gervais would total the awards show funny, but the guy who took the piss out of everyone last year – which made for accomplished TV and ratings – seemed like a comedy franchise that’s run out of steam. He reasonable wasn’t that funny.

Loved the casual opening – “So where was I?” – as if no at the same time at all had passed at all. And the comparison of the GGs to that other awards show (“like the Oscars but without all that deem”) had a bit of edge, as did the (slightly dated) Jodie Foster Beaver zinger (“I haven’t seen it...and a lot of guys here haven’t either”).

But a Justin Bieber joke that wasn’t absolutely a joke? A dig at Kim Kardashian? A soft bit about Johnny Depp and Eddie Murphy in nuisance? Surely he could have come up with some more biting material – especially since this year’s solemnity was one of the starriest ever, with Brangelina, Streep, Spielberg and Scorsese drinking champers in the audience.

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